day tripper

Haha I just read about the snake bites, I'm getting them. I loves them!(: Anywho, you still have me amazingly engaged in this and I'm so excited. haha Instead of ...

Wowwww. Like woww. I really really really really liked this. it was amazing in every way. It confused me a little when he was talking in the end but then ...

I say that you should work a little more before posting. Also, you have the first part in first person but the other rest is in third. It confused me. ...

Okay, well hello first off and welcome to the site!(: Alright, first off, before I get into any details Imma get straight to the point: Your story needs work. It ...

When I first opened this, I contiplated on reading it. You need to space out you're paragraphs, and if you switch from scene to scene or to a different thought, ...

I've done a piece before where there's a character running. You aced it(: It was very nice, everything about it, the scenery, his thoughts. All too well. I loved the ...

That was good. Reall, I liked it. Though, I would suggest maybe putting your flashbacks in italics so that it doesn't confuse your readers(like it did with me, haha) and ...

Ahhh! You end it here? wait so the bet was true about Chad? BLAH I dont care, this was good. I really liked the series, it was very intreguing. You ...

To tell the truth, I wasn't completely into this. But I do like where it's going, but some things were just... I'm not sure, let's say 'Not me'. But, it ...

You are an amazing writer. All your chapters are planned out and that's a great thing. It's not like you write and then tap your finger and go okay now ...

Oh my goshh, that was a twist! Ahh finally something so original. Haha I like it. I really do. The only thing that confused me was the bar thing I ...

The other critiquers tooks what I needed to say (Good job guys!(;) haha But for my own opinion, I really like this. Like fo' real. My friend Bailey writes boy ...

Oh my god, this is really good. I mean, not like you know, her being raped... that's upsetting, but the way it was described not to the point where it ...

Ohhhh i like it(: It's very unique. I didn't expect them to be into Horses, especially Ryder. Since he's a wolf and all... haha But I love how she talked ...

Ello Derek!(: Ugh, I have to rewrite this because of my icky computer. d; What I didn't like : - I think you need more details and descriptions. Like, I ...